Malaysian Politics 101 with Woody Allen

by INVISIBLEWRITER101

All politicians should worship Woody Allen. Watch his films and it’ll give you basic ideas on “How To Be A Politician!”

I believe some might be wondering who the hell is Woody Allen? And, why him? In my opinion he’s one of the greatest film directors alive.

His films might not be as big and explosive as Michael Bay’s ‘Transformers’ but it can put Optimus Prime to shame with his wit. He has won the Academy Award for Best Director once for his work in ‘Annie Hall’ back in 1977. And he’s quite prolific too.

On average he directs 1 film a year. It shows he has a lot to say about anything and everything.
Take this quote for example:

“Eighty percent of success is showing up” Woody Allen

The quote above proves that he is a genius and can see the future. Some parties cited poor voters turnout as the reason for BN’s loss in Kuala Terengganu.

For me the reason why BN loss in Kuala Terengganu was because no one took Woody Allen seriously.

I don’t think no one in BN ever thought of learning politics from Woody Allen’s films. Take his films seriously and you’ll be a successful politician.

Take ‘Match Point’ for example. The sexy scene on ‘Match Point’ will secure you the winning point or should I say the winning vote. But how? Easy, sleep with your voters!

What about ‘Vicky Christina Barcelona’? Well, it clearly advocates you to flirt. Flirt with strangers. Flirt with your voters if you’re a politician.

“How far will you go to make your dreams come true?” is the tagline from ‘Cassandra’s Dream’.

Watch this film and it’ll educate you on how to make your dream to be a politician come true.
‘Small Time Crook’ will inspire everyone to think big.

In Malaysia, a small time crook can possibly be a big time politician. Watch this and you may be one of them.

‘Anything Else’ is a romantic comedy about an alder guy giving advice to his young protégé on how to tackle girls.

In Malaysia, it’s about a former Prime Minister giving advice to his not-so-young protégé! Listen to that oldman, he has twice as much more sensible things to say than all our current leaders put together.

But there’s one thing you shouldn’t do.

Don’t marry your adopted daughter like he did!